Ever been afraid of what will happen if you change?

Here's one of my favorite post-transformation tools.

Last week, I wrote to you about my recent foray into public speaking. It was an incredibly expansive experience - not only to be vulnerable on stage, but also to witness the wisdom the other presenters shared. And the energy in the room from the amazing attendees was quite electric. It changed people, me included.

Since I’ve returned home, it’s been a bit weird to get back to my “normal”, everyday life. There are still kids to feed and hay to toss (not to mention a dance studio to run!)

But I feel like a different person on the inside… I took what felt like big risks; I met new people; I heard incredible stories. I’ll never be the same as a result. But what now after this awesome, dream-come-true event is over?

I’ve had expansive experiences like this before, but I haven’t always handled them well. After hosting my first equine coaching worksop (I was so nervous!), I got good and hammered instead of sitting in the sometimes uncomfortable feelings of a dream come true. 🤦🏻‍♀️ It was like some part of me needed to tamp down the excitement and amazement - I couldn’t take it.

In hindsight, I guess that hangover was exactly what I needed, because this time around, I was too afraid of the splitting headache to have one too many margs. And I wasn’t willing to numb it all.

This time, I’m more open, more able to let all of the goodness sink in. I’m slowing down. I’m letting the dust settle in a way that informs where I’m going and why. It feels uncomfortable at times but oddly pleasant - I love it.

In case it’s helpful for you, too, here’s the tool I keep coming back to. It’s as simple as they come:

Before enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. - Zen Buddhist saying

Even though I feel like a different person at the moment (though not enlightened, sadly 😉), and I’m not sure what to make of that, I’m staying grounded in the simple actions that make up my daily life.

I’m riding around in the side-by-side with hay in the back and my dog by my side. I’m wiping down the countertops after dinner. I’m driving my daughter and her gaggle of friends to the movies. I’m just doing it all with a new level of presence and awareness.

I’m living this question: How does “new” Hannah do all of the same old shit? 😂

Have you ever been afraid of the effects of your own transformation? If you change, how will your partner react? Will you have to quit your job? What if your friends don’t understand?

This practice of doing the same old shit, with presence and curiosity, can help a lot. It can help you remember that change doesn’t always require that you burn your life down. Most often, I find that Life actually meets you right where you are.

You can simply continue to chop wood and carry water, and you’ll end up right where you’re meant to be. Which is what most of us are after, right? 🙏🏻

One of my other “chop wood, carry water” activities has been meeting with my clients. And I have just a few more spots open before the end of the year.

If you’d like to learn a bit more about yourself, maybe get more excited about being you… If you’re interested in expanding on your gifts and taking a look at what some of your potential hangups might be… If you’d like to make more aligned decisions without so much resistance…

I’d love to dive into your Human Design. I offered Journey On Podcast Summit attendees a $50 discount on a Human Design Deep Dive, and I’d love to extend that offer to include those of you here who didn’t attend the event - some gratitude for tuning in every week and reading all the way to the end! 😜

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