it was simpler than I thought

I was talking with a friend a couple weeks ago, and something came out of my mouth that I’ve thought a lot about since…

I told her that I often see two extremes in the world of horse ownership.

In one camp are the owners who run a dictatorship where they’re at the top, and their horse is at the bottom - a citizen without any constitutional rights. Even if the owner has good intentions, their horse’s needs and feelings are often ignored.

In another camp are the owners who are so concerned with their horse’s feelings that they set all authority aside, often unintentionally, and end up metaphorically (or sometimes quite literally) being stepped all over.

I used to fall in the second camp. Too scared to hurt my horse’s feelings, too afraid that if I messed something up our relationship would be ruined, terrified that I didn’t have what it took to be a good leader.

So what was it that eventually moved me forward?

For one, support. I found a trainer and amazing horse friends who are in alignment with how I want to be as a horsewoman. Sooooo helpful!

But more than anything, it was simply willingness. I was willing to step into the messy in-between of two extremes, without any idea what I was doing or how I’d get where I wanted to go. I was willing to make mistakes and learn from them. I was willing to keep trying, again and again.

Since that word willingness came out of my mouth, I’ve wondered over and over where else in my life I could take the same approach and make some progress toward the things I desire most.

And when willingness alone isn’t quite enough to get unstuck, where can I enlist support? How can I make the transition even easier?

In yoga teacher training, my teachers talk about how to scale things. Can’t do a single leg bridge yet? Scale it back by keeping both feet on the ground and weighting one leg a little more than the other to begin building strength in a way that makes the journey toward the eventual goal easier. Take baby steps.

In the end, slowing down and scaling back and getting support will actually get you there faster. Often counterintuitive, but so true.